


The Workings of Human Beings

by Luna_Myth



Series: and i am coming home to you (if it's the last thing that i do) [6]
Category: Sword Art Online (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Rewrite, Crying, Don't Examine This Too Closely, Drama & Romance, F/M, Feelings, Female Friendship, Fix-It of Sorts, Friendship, Gen, I lived bitch, I'm Sorry, Luna Reacts to New SAO, POV Alternating, Pregnancy, Separations, Talking, Technology, Virtual Reality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-13 14:43:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18471064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_Myth/pseuds/Luna_Myth
Summary: Continues from "Something Deeply Important" and SAO 15: Alicization Invading. Asuna stands up for herself. Eugeo goes back home. {About Missing People verse}





	The Workings of Human Beings

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so sorry this took so long! i kept saying i was going to update but i've been busy with school and stuff, it's my senior year of high school and i'm graduating soon. i hope those of you who waited enjoy the update. i tried my best.

Without even realizing it, Asuna was suddenly holding Lieutenant Kikuoka, a man six inches taller than her, off the floor by his collar, so the fabric of his shirt stretched and the heels of his bizarre sandals grazed the ground. She should not have been able to do it, but anger and cold determination had propelled her past her normal limitations. In a way, it was a lot like the times when a player’s will made them capable of bypassing the restraints of the Cardinal system for a moment. The only difference being, this was real life. 

“If Kirito doesn’t wake up,” Asuna said, her voice shaking slightly, “I’ll make sure you regret it.” 

Kikuoka didn’t even try to escape or shift the blame, merely holding up his hands and saying, “I understand, and as it is my responsibility, I will absolutely see that Kirito is restored.” 

Asuna continued to glare at him for a tense moment before her hand twitched involuntarily and she released him, her anger giving way to fear in an instant. Kikuoka fell back to the floor and steadied himself on his feet, awkwardly adjusting his shirt and examining his throat with concern. Asuna’s face crumpled and burned with shame at her actions. She felt like she might cry, which would be just as inappropriate as that wild display of anger. Without thinking, her hand fell to her stomach. 

Rinko noticed her distress and hurried over to her, putting a hand on her back protectively. “Are you okay?” she asked quietly. 

Asuna looked at her, blinking back tears, feeling very small all of a sudden, and Rinko pulled her into a hug, murmuring soothing things. Asuna heaved a stifled sob into Rinko’s chest. The doctor continued to rub her back and whisper to her. Tears trickled down Asuna’s cheeks. 

“It’ll be alright,” said Rinko into Asuna’s ear. “He’ll come back to you. He’ll come back and you’ll make a lovely family.” 

Asuna hiccoughed and tried to dash away her tears, mostly unsuccessfully. “Yes...you’re right...I...I’m sorry...about all of this….” She felt mildly faint. 

“Shh, it’s alright,” said Rinko, still holding Asuna by the shoulders to make sure she was okay. “You’re under a lot of stress.” 

Asuna nodded silently. “Can we sit down?” Her voice was barely audible. Despite her best efforts, she felt as if Rinko were holding her up. 

“Of course.” Rinko led her over to the closest of the various office chairs in the room, and Asuna’s knees buckled almost immediately. She put her face in her hands, her eyes burning with more tears. 

At that moment, just as the scene was settling down, there was the sound of someone bursting into the room. Asuna didn’t look up as Kikuoka and the others had a quick conversation with someone. It sounded bad, but so did nearly everything else about the situation. Asuna slowly felt her pulse return to normal, and she delicately touched her abdomen with one hand, concerned in the aftermath of her breakdown and equally ashamed that it had happened. 

“So once again, our final hope rests with him….” Kikuoka’s voice penetrated Asuna’s mental fog. “Higa, how is Kirito’s condition?” 

Asuna sat up sharply, taking a deep breath. She had to focus. If there was anything she could do to help Kirito on this side, she had to be paying attention. 

Higa made eye contact with her, no doubt concerned by her recent fainting spell, but Asuna stared back, squaring her shoulders. She’d fought skeletons and kobolds and terrifying monstrosities of every kind with the threat of real death hanging over her head--this should be nothing compared to that. Kirito’s life had been threatened before, and she had always managed to protect him then, and she was going to protect him now, because he would do the same for her. 

“You can tell me,” she said, softly but with notes of steel. “I can take it.” 

Higa nodded, his brow concerned. “Well, to put it simply…he’s holding steady one step short of the worst case scenario...Miss Asuna.” 

Asuna’s muscles tensed, like she was going to throw up, but she managed to stay somewhat calm, her knuckles clenched white on her lap. She gave a tense nod. 

Higa ran through a lot of technical details in the longest speech she’d ever heard him deliver. A lot of it she already knew--she had watched Kirito get hit with the muscle relaxant in the first place, and she had a vague understanding of why they’d put him in the STL to try and heal him. Then Higa said something that made her flinch. 

“...For reasons that remain unclear, probably having to do with the damage to his fluctlight, his memories weren’t blocked. Kirito was sent into the Underworld as himself--Kazuto Kirigaya. And we didn’t know this until we received his contact from within the simulation….” 

A few feet in front of her, arms crossed protectively, Rinko looked shocked. “W-wait a minute,” she said. “Are you saying that in the Underworld, with time accelerated, he’s been living as himself? For...how many months…?” 

Asuna felt like she was going to get sick again as Higa answered, “...About two and a half years.” 

Then he paused and looked at her, frowning. “Are you sure you’re okay, Asuna? Your face has gone pale.” 

“F-fine,” she stammered. “Please, continue.” 

Still frowning, Higa preceded to explain his theory for how and why Kirito had reached the central console that had allowed him to contact the outside world. Asuna’s heart ached hearing Higa talk about Kirito’s likely motivation of saving the artificial fluctlights in the Underworld. It was exactly something Kirito would do, and it made her love him and miss him all the more because she had a feeling if she met the people of the Underworld, she would want to save them too. It also didn’t surprise Asuna to find her boyfriend had overcome improbable odds to enter the cathedral and access this console. If the situation in the Underworld was anywhere near as dire as the situation here, Kirito would be fighting with his whole heart, the full fury of the Black Swordsman, to rectify it, and Asuna couldn’t help but think, or perhaps hope, that the thought of reuniting with her was motivating him as well. 

“It turned out he had a number of helpers,” Higa was saying. “Artificial fluctlights, of course.... He had friends. Some of them died in the battle against the church, so when he finally succeeded in opening the circuit to the outside, he was in a state of extreme distress. I believe he blamed himself. In other words, he was attacking his own fluctlight.” 

Asuna did not like where this was going. 

“Just then,” Higa went on, “our shady attackers cut the power line, and the momentary power surge caused an instant spike in the STL’s output. The result was that Kirito’s self-destructive impulse was actualized...and his ego was deactivated…” 

Asuna didn’t want to hear anymore, but Rinko asked, “What do you mean his ego was deactivated?” The doctor was frowning, which didn’t bode well. 

Higa pulled up a graph on his console and explained the working theory of decision-making in the self-image center of the fluctlight, pointing out how Kirito’s was damaged by the power surge. Asuna felt tears prick her eyes again, overwhelmed by the turn of events, and she buried her face in her hands once more as she continued to listen. Surely it couldn’t be that bad. Surely there was some way to help him. 

“And…” Rinko started to say, sounding almost afraid to ask. She paused, and Asuna felt but did not see Rinko look at her. “...what is the status of his conscious mind right now?” 

Asuna closed her eyes tight behind her hands. 

“I’m afraid to say,” said Higa after a moment. “He might not be aware of who he is, or what he should be doing…unable to say or do anything….” 

Asuna released a single strangled cry into her hands, fear filling her heart, before the room lapsed into melancholy silence. Rinko noiselessly walked over to her and put a steadying hand on her back. 

 

XXX 

 

Eugeo entered the cabin, hung up his sword and coat, and closed the door behind him. It was a small cabin, not really designed for three people, but Eugeo didn’t mind too much. The alternative was staying in his old room in Rulid village, and he hated the idea of that much more than he disliked sharing a bedroom with two other people. To be honest, he actually kind of liked it. Growing up, he had shared a bedroom with his brothers, and he liked Alice and Kirito much more than he liked his brothers. Part of him, an old and unchanged part, thought of it like a sleepover with his two childhood friends, and so that part of him was delighted with the turn of events. 

His happiness was considerably hampered by two things, however. The first was that the village had rejected Alice upon her return due to the stigma of breaking the Taboo Index. His hope of ever returning to the village with Alice and going back to the way things were was permanently shattered, but at least he had been prepared for the loss by his journey. Now he dreamed of a different happy ending, but that too was being hindered by the second thing--neither of his friends were as he had known them. 

Alice, he understood, still didn’t remember him, or anything about her upbringing in Rulid. He still possessed that fragment of her memory made physical, but he didn’t know what to do with it. Kirito might know, if he and Eugeo and most importantly Alice could come to a consensus on it, but as unlike his childhood friend as this Alice was, Kirito’s situation was worse. The black-haired swordsman was almost completely catatonic, unable to move on his own and barely capable of responding to anything. It was almost like Kirito wasn’t there at all. 

Eugeo had been unconscious when it happened, but Alice had informed him that something had happened to Kirito while in the Central Cathedral after he’d defeated Administrator. Whatever it was, he had collapsed on the ground, and even now that he was awake, he didn’t seem conscious. He couldn’t speak or express his will in any way, it seemed. This was especially problematic considering the fact that, apparently, an invasion from the Dark Territory was on its way, and Kirito was one of the best fighters, if not  _ the  _ best, in the entire Human Realm. 

So Eugeo was not entirely content with the situation, as glad as he was to be alive and with his friends. 

“It’s pretty weird to be back here and chopping down trees again, huh, Alice,” said Eugeo, walking over to the center of the kitchen-dining room to say hi to Kirito. The black-haired man was in a wheelchair of Alice’s construction, and the two of them took turns looking after him while the other did tasks like gather firewood or attempt to wrestle fair pay from the villagers. Today, it had been Alice’s turn to watch after Kirito. 

“I don’t remember being here previously,” she reminded him. “But yes, it is weird.” She turned to him from where she’d been apparently testing her cooking on Kirito, who was quietly chewing something, and said, “Is that what you used to do when you were here, then? Chop down trees?” 

“It was just one big tree,” said Eugeo, sitting down at the dining room table beside Kirito. He smiled. “It’s what Kirito’s sword is made out of. He helped me cut it down and freed me from my Calling.” 

Alice nodded like this made sense to her. 

“Morning, Kirito,” Eugeo said cheerfully, facing his friend. “Or I guess it’s lunchtime now. Has Alice’s cooking gotten any better?” 

The swordsman in black did not respond, merely continuing to stare blankly into space, his eyes glassy like polished obsidian. Eugeo sighed.

“Is there anything else we can do for him, you think?” he asked Alice sadly. “I feel like I’m not doing enough, not for Kirito, not for anybody.” 

“I don’t know what else can be done,” said Alice. Both of them were staring at Kirito as they talked, watching him for any signs that their friend was still in there. Eugeo owed him so much, not just for all he’d done for him during their journey to find Alice, but for being his friend growing up, a fact he’d only recently remembered. Kirito needed to get better so they could talk about that, too. 

Hesitantly, Eugeo asked, “Are you sure we shouldn’t be helping prepare for the Dark Territory invasion, Alice?” They had already had this conversation multiple times, but Eugeo couldn’t help asking again. He just had this nagging feeling he was forgetting to do something important--like there was some big picture he wasn’t aware of, but still needed to contribute to. His mind tingled in a way that for the first time in as long as he could remember had nothing to do with missing memories. 

“We can’t bring Kirito to the battlefield and we can’t leave him here,” said Alice stubbornly. Eugeo was pretty sure that part of her personality hadn’t changed at least. “The best thing we can do for him is look after him here.” 

Eugeo thought it over again, just as he did every time, but this time, for no obvious reason, he realized something new. 

“But I’m not happy here anymore,” said Eugeo. “I mean--I am happy here, with you, and Kirito, but not because it’s here. My old dream of coming back here, to the village, with you and Kirito--it was a good dream, but I’d like to amend it. I don’t want to stay here anymore. I want to go anywhere else with the two of you, and help people, and go on adventures.” 

“Here isn’t that bad,” Alice argued. Eugeo was surprised--she didn’t remember growing up here, after all. What kind of attachment could she have to a place that wouldn’t even let her live within its borders? 

“It’s peaceful,” she continued. “And Selka lives here.” 

“Selka is nice,” Eugeo conceded. “I just...don’t you think Kirito would want us to keep fighting? I think  _ I _ want us to keep fighting. We ought to be helping to defend the Human Realm. Even if it’s a lost cause, isn’t it better to try?” 

This was the first time Eugeo had voiced this opinion to Alice, and he was surprised at his own enthusiasm. It wasn’t like him to stand by his own opinion like that, but he’d felt different since nearly dying in the Central Cathedral, and with Kirito out of commission, someone had to argue in favor of the incredibly reckless courses of action. 

Alice was about to respond when there came a sudden commotion from outside. It sounded like her dragon had spotted something. Eugeo exchanged a glance with her, and they both rushed to the door to look outside. The dragon was indeed pacing the clearing in excitement, wriggling its body like it was about to launch itself into the sky. 

Eugeo opened the door and peered up at the sky, trying to see what the dragon was seeing. 

It was Eldrie Synthesis 31. 

 

XXX

 

“I’ll go,” said Asuna, suddenly flushed with determination. Everyone in the room had been discussing how to help Kirito, since the fate of the entire project rested upon him, and as the conversation had trailed off, everyone had reached the same conclusion--someone needed to go in to help him. Moreover, Asuna was the obvious choice. 

“I’ll go into the Underworld,” she said again, standing up delicately and brushing down her skirt. “I want to go in there and tell Kirito that he did good things. That through all the hardships and sad things that I’m sure happened, he did everything he could.”  _ Because that’s who he is _ , Asuna added silently to herself. She made further effort to steady herself as she stood facing the others, awaiting their response. 

Everyone was silent for another moment, then--

“We do have another STL in here,” said Kikuoka, gesturing. “But the Underworld is not in a peaceful state right now. Within a few hours our time, it should be entering the final stress test phase, as we had planned it out.” 

Before Asuna could ask exactly what that entailed, Rinko did for her. Kikuoka and Higa explained that basically the humans were about to be attacked by an army of monsters the likes of which they had never seen before, and since Kirito had destroyed the Axiom Church--for good reason, Asuna was sure--no one had any idea what was going to happen. 

“So maybe we  _ should _ ask Asuna to do the dive,” said Higa thoughtfully. “Not only will she be best at communicating with Kirito, but combat ability will be needed to protect Alice. And out of all the people here, Asuna’s easily the most experienced at virtual movement.” 

“It’s hard to beat two years of constant exposure followed by two years of VRMMORPGs as a hobby,” said Asuna, smiling wryly despite herself. She was starting to worry about something, but didn’t know how to bring it up yet. 

“It would still be best to find a high-ranking account for you,” said Kikuoka. “The higher-ranking the better.” 

“Well, you’ve got your pick of the litter,” said Higa, pulling up a list. “Knights, generals, nobles… We’ve got a whole variety of high-ranking accounts to use.” 

Rinko said something to Higa, but Asuna stopped paying attention, turning to Kikuoka instead. “There’s not any real danger, is there?” she asked hesitantly. “I’d go even if there was, but what if something like the power surge happened again?” 

Kikuoka raised an eyebrow. “The auxiliary power line is nowhere near the intruders, and even if it was, they wouldn’t be likely to cut it. They need it just as much as we do if they want to get Alice’s lightcube. Why do you ask? You don’t seem the type to be concerned with personal safety at a time like this.” 

Asuna blushed. “W-well, I…” She wasn’t sure she wanted to say, but her concerns overruled her uncertainty. “I’m pregnant, and I wanted to be sure of how dangerous this was. It’s a rather unique situation. Are you sure it’s safe for…?” And here her courage ran out, and she simply looked at him, one hand touching her stomach and her brow furrowed with concern. 

Kikuoka’s baffled expression increased, his eyebrows nearly disappearing into his hair, but he said quite calmly, “It should be fine, but we’ll keep a close eye on you just to make sure. Quite frankly, none of us considered the possibility of someone who is pregnant using the STL, but I don’t see any reason to think it would have negative effects.” 

Higa’s head jerked up from his screen. “Excuse me, did you just say--” 

“Thank you, Mr. Kikuoka,” Asuna interrupted, not wanting to talk about it. “What sort of accounts are we choosing between?” 

“But--” 

“There are three or four high-ranking accounts that have been designated for the goddesses of this world,” said Rinko helpfully. “Let’s look at those.” 

“But she’s…” said Higa, deeply confused. “There’s gonna...Is no one else…? ….a baby? But...they’re….” 

“It’s no concern of yours,” Asuna insisted, her temper hot. Anger and inexplicable, irrepressible shame churned in her blood despite her best efforts. It was all she could do not to snap at Higa, who was merely trying to understand the situation and failing to. She was sure he was a fine computer programmer, but it did not surprise her he had little idea how to keep up with the workings of human beings. 

As she suspected, he reddened and turned back to his console. “Okay,” he said. “But I’ll be interested to hear how this affects your experience inside the STL.” 

Asuna nodded stiffly and kept working with Rinko to decide on an account. She had to get in there soon. As if fate were out to spite her, it seemed Kirito was very much in real danger once again, and every moment he spent in the Underworld alone and injured felt like a wound to Asuna’s own heart. Mixed with her heightened emotional state and a strong desire to tell Kirito what had happened, Asuna was barely able to stay still as she waited to enter the Soul Translator. She was finally going to be able to do something to help him, and more than that--she was finally going to be able to see him again. Somehow, it felt much longer than the few days that had passed since he’d asked her to move with him to America and subsequently been attacked. For Kirito, it had been literally years, but Asuna too felt as if several lifetimes had passed since she last saw her lover. 

“Okay, we’re all set,” Rinko said, finishing up a technical conversation with Higa. “You ready, Asuna?” 

“Yes.” There was no doubt in Asuna’s mind, only determination. “I’m ready.” 


End file.
